Welcome!
Here at Goldilox and the Three Weres we LOVE Halloween! So we wrangled up some willing authors and put together some fun posts and giveaways for you all!
Our theme for the event this year is What Scares You?
Check back every weekday between October 20th and October 31st to see which authors are visiting and the awesomeness they are each giving away!
Today's author is:
Our theme for the event this year is What Scares You?
Check back every weekday between October 20th and October 31st to see which authors are visiting and the awesomeness they are each giving away!
Today's author is:
Lucienne Diver
Alright Lucienne, what scares you?
What Scares Me and Why?
Well, that’s a loaded question, isn’t it? I feel a little bit like Adrian Monk, you know, that wonderful quirky television detective. I haven’t figured quite how to rank my greatest fears yet, but my list would run something like this:
1- Spiders
2- Camel Crickets, silverfish, cockroaches, palmetto bugs, all other bugs of any sort but particularly those with too many legs like millipedes and centipedes. Gah, I’m freaking myself out!
3- Psychos. (Not the boom, you’re dead kind, but the ones that like to play with their prey.)
4- Did I mention Spiders?
5- Ooky stuff. That’s right, I said ooky. As in slobber, bodily fluids, people’s half-eaten food, squishy-rotten bananas, raw oysters, mayonnaise… Bleck, there I’ve gone and given myself the shivers.
Okay, I take it back, mayonnaise might come first. It might even beat out monkey brains and other things I’m not likely to ever encounter in my lifetime. Because mayonnaise sneaks up on you. Don’t believe me? The scene is set—you’re at a nice little hole-in-the-wall restaurant with your BFF or your SO or your imaginary friend. The kind of place where grease hangs in the air and you can practically taste the carb-loaded goodness of the burger on order, loaded down with bacon and other artery-abusing substances of choice. No mention is made in the menu of the ooky stuff. You think you’re safe. And then the burger arrives, the heavenly scent teasing your taste buds. Salivation starts all on its own. Your stomach rumbles in protest at the delay it knows will come when you insist on doctoring your burger with ketchup or barbeque sauce or honey mustard. And then you take the bun off to do just that and—don-don-DA! (mood music, in case you’re wondering)—you’re faced with the horror. The woeful white stuff of DOOM!
It’s like something out of a horror film, no? Like finding out that Soylent Green is people!
So there you have it. Now you know. Mayonnaise is my kryptonite. I hope you will use the knowledge only for good.
Lucienne Diver is the author of Vamped young adult series (think Clueless meets Buffy) and the Latter-Day Olympians urban fantasy series from Samhain, which Long and Short Reviews called “a clever mix of Janet Evanovich and Rick Riordan”. Her short stories have appeared in the KICKING IT, STRIP-MAULED, and FANGS FOR THE MAMMARIES anthologies from Roc and Baen Books respectively and her essay “Abuse” in DEAR BULLY: 70 Authors Tell Their Stories from HarperCollins.
And you can meet Lucienne Diver, along with 49 other spectacular paranormal/fantasy authors at Coastal Magic Convention in Daytona Beach, FL next February!
Click the Coastal Magic button to check out the event!
Lucienne Diver is giving away a signed copy of BAD BLOOD, the first book in herLatter-Day Olympians series!!!
This giveaway is for United States residents only.
(Winner must be 13 or older)
All of the Goldilox and the Three Scares giveaways end at 11:59pm on November 7th!
All of the Goldilox and the Three Scares giveaways end at 11:59pm on November 7th!
Mayo? Mayo? That beats out zombies? (I suppose it could be really bad, and you could get zombies carrying mayo.)
ReplyDeleteAnd since you dislike bugs, it is good you live in a state that doesn't specialize in BUGS THE SIZE OF BUICKS.
LOL. Great spotlight :) I bet you would have disliked my ex-boss when she'd dip her fries in mayonnaise. Then again who wouldn't? *Yuckie!*
ReplyDeleteLOL, Deborah! I have to say that if escaping zombies meant wading into a mayo swamp (because that could happen), I might end up one of the undead. Or I'd find my inner urban fantasy heroine and kick zombie bahookie!
ReplyDeleteWhat state are you talking about? I live in the state of denial!
-Lucienne
I love mayo and pretty much eat it everyday. I'm not a big fan of ketchup though.
ReplyDeleteI think the ook factor for me comes from the fact that we had a friend growing up who used to eat mayo sandwiches...with the mayo dripping out and splattering like blood... Of course, that would work even better with ketchup!
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